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About Literature / Hobbyist jessicaconkFemale/United States Recent Activity
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I'm wondering if this was a mistake,

that I'm just so afraid to be close
that I chose someone eighteen hours away;

that I will arrive at your doorstep
and you'll just tell me to go home,

that I'm not pretty enough for you,
that I seem a little crazy,

to fly all this way just to crash on your couch.
"What are you expecting from me?"

Or worse, you'll ask me to fall in love
and I'll have to tell you that I don't believe,

that you were just a cute coworker
and I'm just a little impulsive,

always looking for my next adventure
and I was kind of hoping it could be you

and yes I am a little off-kilter,
but I'm not looking for anything serious,

that you really shouldn't love me
cause I'm having a hard time loving myself

and no, I won't move to Kansas for you,
but if you move to Texas when I go

I wouldn't mind the company.
Cute Boys Send Bizarre Texts
And now you know the reason behind my Kansas trip.

What you don't know is how fucking insane he is driving me, because I have been straight with him this whole time, and he won't tell me he likes me, but he'll sing me a voicemail that tells me to "come on over to the country". and he won't tell me he likes me, but he'll ask me to move to Kansas. And he acts like he likes me, but then he ignores my texts when I ask to hear about his idea of bringing me to Kansas. And what he doesn't know if how weird this is for me, that he's the first person I've liked since 2012.

My friends think he's a serial killer. I think he's just dumb.

I've always said the Baltimore dating scene is beat. Figures I go for someone in Kansas. FML
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In the ever-so-me style, I will be leaving in November to go adventure. This year's destination is Kansas, which is random as fuck, I know, especially since last year's was New York City (I want every year to be NYC). I'll be flying out, urbexing, chilling with some of my friends there (and possibly you, if you're also there, reader), then driving back to Maryland. I bought a journal to record the road trip in, and I'll have my cassette tapes for talking to myself, and oh yeah, one working camera lens and possibly a disposable camera.

So what I would ask of you, dear reader, is to possibly do the following:
-let me know if you want postcards
-make me a mixed cd for the trip home since I can't carry my giant cd binder with me on the plane
-tell me of any interesting places I might want to visit

I know it's only August, but I am SYKED. Also, if you want to know the ~real~ reason I chose Kansas this year (I was going to choose Kansas eventually, okay? I swear), I will tell you in a PM. 

And if you're reading this like "how does this effect me?", then my answer for you is "pictures and possibly poems and hopefully not angsty teenage heart poems, real poems, and more pictures."

I'm posting more on here lately than my real blog. I haven't even told LABC about the trip yet. And they're just now finding out about the car (in a poetic fashion, of course). Feel honored.

Also, if you have a twitter and you're not following me, why? I'm hilarious. LittleApBigCity.Do It. 
  • Mood: Eager
  • Listening to: Mixed CDs
  • Playing: Dragon Age Inquisition
  • Eating: Chipotle
I've bought a new lens, so pictures will be new soon! I can't wait to get my camera back <3

I'm also getting a new car, and I wish I could say this week has been great because of these two awesome things, but instead this week has just been weird. These two awesome things have cancelled out two very bad things.

Lessons I've learned this week:
Don't tell people you like them.
People are way too easily impressed by women working on cars.
Your stubbornness will sometimes block you from seeing an easier path for fixing things.
Sleep on all major life decisions.

With the new car comes the saying goodbye to my old car. It's been great. You were a miracle and what I needed, but I will be so glad to finally have AC and working speakers and a working cigarette lighter and and and and. But really, I'll probably cry when I take her to the junk yard. She deserves a better fate. 

I'm tearing up just thinking about it. 

I need to stop getting so emotionally attached to material objects (and people, always people).
  • Mood: Remorse
  • Listening to: Jason Derulo
  • Reading: The Dark Tower by Stephen King
  • Playing: Dragon Age Inquisition
  • Eating: Chipotle
  • Drinking: Vanilla Coke
In the ever-so-me style, I will be leaving in November to go adventure. This year's destination is Kansas, which is random as fuck, I know, especially since last year's was New York City (I want every year to be NYC). I'll be flying out, urbexing, chilling with some of my friends there (and possibly you, if you're also there, reader), then driving back to Maryland. I bought a journal to record the road trip in, and I'll have my cassette tapes for talking to myself, and oh yeah, one working camera lens and possibly a disposable camera.

So what I would ask of you, dear reader, is to possibly do the following:
-let me know if you want postcards
-make me a mixed cd for the trip home since I can't carry my giant cd binder with me on the plane
-tell me of any interesting places I might want to visit

I know it's only August, but I am SYKED. Also, if you want to know the ~real~ reason I chose Kansas this year (I was going to choose Kansas eventually, okay? I swear), I will tell you in a PM. 

And if you're reading this like "how does this effect me?", then my answer for you is "pictures and possibly poems and hopefully not angsty teenage heart poems, real poems, and more pictures."

I'm posting more on here lately than my real blog. I haven't even told LABC about the trip yet. And they're just now finding out about the car (in a poetic fashion, of course). Feel honored.

Also, if you have a twitter and you're not following me, why? I'm hilarious. LittleApBigCity.Do It. 
  • Mood: Eager
  • Listening to: Mixed CDs
  • Playing: Dragon Age Inquisition
  • Eating: Chipotle

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jessicaconk

Artist | Hobbyist | Literature
United States
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:icontwindisch:
twindisch Featured By Owner Aug 21, 2015  Hobbyist Photographer
Thanks for watching :)
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:iconneonsquiggle:
neonsquiggle Featured By Owner Aug 20, 2015  Hobbyist Writer
Thanks for the favorite, dear!
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:iconkairui-chan:
Kairui-chan Featured By Owner Aug 13, 2015  Student General Artist
Thank you for the deviantWatch! (ノ^ヮ^)ノ*:・゚✧
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:iconladylincoln:
LadyLincoln Featured By Owner Jul 17, 2015  Hobbyist Writer
Thank you for your :+fav: I appreciate the support!

With love,
:heart:
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:iconseraphiclungs:
seraphiclungs Featured By Owner Jul 17, 2015  Hobbyist Writer
Thank you for collecting my work <3
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